81. Four Leaf Clover
A person finds a four leaf clover. He feels sure that it will
bring him good luck.
Another person runs into him. They accuse each other of running
into each other.
They start hitting each other. A policeman comes along, the other
guy accuses
the lucky person. The lucky person is hauled off to jail.
The lucky person
reappears, disgruntled and unhappy. Garbage is dumped on him as he
walks along
and gets fined by a policeman for littering. The lucky man throws
away the four
leaf clover. Another finds it. The former lucky man comes
back on stage. The
person who found the four leaf runs on stage saying he just won a
million dollars
and has good luck since he found it. The former lucky man slumps
down, groans,
and begins to cry.
82. The Four Seasons
The narrator narrates, everyone else is volunteers.
"I need eleven volunteers for this skit."
"This skit is called the Four Seasons. You three are
trees. You three are leaves
in trees, get up in the trees. You're poison ivy, cling to the
roots of one of the trees.
You're tree's blood, you run through the trees. You two are birds,
flit from tree to
tree and sing. And you're the babbling brook. You have to
babble."
"Babble babble babble babble ..."
"In the spring, the leaves come out on the trees. The birds
flit from tree to tree."
"In the summer, the leaves open up and the sun shines down on the
forest. The
birds form flocks"
"In the fall, the leaves drop from the trees. The birds fly
away south."
"In the winter, the brook freezes and stops babbling. All
seems still in the forest.
But beneath it all there is still life. Look! The sap is still
running!"
83. Fred the Trained Flea
"Here in my hand is Fred the Trained Flea. Fred will perform
for you some
amazing feats. Watch closely."
"Fred, do jumping jacks! Very good! Cheer, everyone!"
"Fred, do a somersault!"
"Fred, do a high jump!" Watch him go way up, then back down.
"Now Fred will do a long jump. I need a volunteer to catch
Fred." Pick a
scoutmaster, or someone in authority.
"Fred, do a long jump!" Watch Fred jump to the volunteer
"Oh! He seems to have
jumped into your hair!"
Walk over to the volunteer, start picking through their hair.
"Here we are .. no,
that's not Fred." toss the flea over your shoulder "Ah! No,
that's not Fred." "That's not
Fred." "Fred, are you in there?" "That's not Fred
either." "Boy, there's a lot of fleas
in here." "Fred? Fred?" ...
84. The General Store
The scene is a general store, with the Storekeeper behind the
counter. The counter is easily
represented by a long table with a few items piled on it.
Behind the Storekeeper is a curtain, which conceals another Scout, the
Storekeeper's Son. He has
a full change of clothes with him.
The Skit
The Storekeeper introduces himself. He explains that this is his
store and his Son helps him to run it. He is very proud of how
hard he works to satisfy every customer, no matter what the customer
wants.
A customer enters, walks up to the counter, and asks for a hat.
The Storekeeper turns and calls out, "Hey Son, I need a
hat." The curtain moves, and a hand reaches through with a
hat. The customer admires it, and they agree on a price. The
customer pays, puts on the hat, and walks out acting pleased. Other
customers repeat the process for a jacket, a shirt, shoes, socks, and a
pair of pants. Each time, there is more movement of the curtain,
and a longer delay before the clothing is handed through the
curtain. There are sounds of grumbling, and the Storekeeper
reminds his son about their commitment to sell whatever the customer
needs.
The last customer walks in hesitantly and asks in embarrassed tones for
underwear. The Storekeeper does not hear him, and makes him repeat
it until everybody can hear clearly. Finally he says, "Oh of
course. Underwear! Son, we need some underwear."
Nothing happens. The Storekeeper repeats his request several times, each
time emphasizing the word, "Underwear." There is no
answer. He apologizes to his customer for his lazy son, and says
he will get the underwear himself. He stomps off behind the
curtain. The curtain shakes, and we hear, "No, Pa! No, Pa!
No!" The Son runs through the
curtain and across the stage wearing only underpants.
85. The Good Samaritan
A Scout walks out from backstage, stumbles, and falls on his face.
He struggles noisily to get up, but keeps his forehead on the
floor. He sometimes succeeds in getting into a position with his
feet and his forehead on the floor, and his butt in the air. He
rotates in this position, keeping his forehead in one place. He
calls for help for help, repeating "My forehead is
stuck!" As he struggles, other Scouts walk casually
past. They ignore him, or look with curiosity, but they do not
help. Finally, a Scout comes running up and heaves the victim to
his feet. The victim is effusively grateful, but the rescuer just
looks at his face. He reaches out, plucks something from the
victim's forehead, and pops it into his mouth.
"Thanks," he says, "I knew I'd lost my gum somewhere
around here!"
86. Green Side Up! Green Side Up!
Characters: A Building Contractor, A Couple (if lady isn't
available, changes can
be made for one person)
Contractor (inside house): Okay, we need a color for the wall
in the living room.
(walks to space that is living room).
Wife: I like white.
Husband: No, how about blue?
Wife: How 'bout tan?
Husband: Okay.
Contractor: Okay...(writes down on paper) um.. wait just a
second. The
contractor goes to the window looks out, he opens the window leans out
and shouts,
"Green side up!"
This repeats for two more rooms. Each time after the Contractor
says "Green Side
Up", couple converses between themselves and are not sure about the
sanity of the
contractor.
After the last room:
Husband: Mr. (whatever you want his name to be), why do you
keep yelling
"Green Side Up!" outside the window? We didn't order any
green wall paper!?!
Contractor: Oh. I am sorry folks. The Boy scout troop
is being lead by the Scout Master
and we just want to make sure the sod gets laid down right.--
87. I Gotta Go Wee
Five guys sleeping in a tent, all in a row. The patrol leader on
one end, the little
scout on the other.
The little scout climbs over all the other sleeping scouts, who try
to remain
asleep, and shakes the patrol leader. "Hey! Hey! I
gotta go wee!"
"Huh? Wha? Go back to sleep." The little scout crawls back
over everyone and
goes back to sleep for 5 seconds.
The little scout climbs over all the other sleeping scouts, who try to
remain
asleep, and shakes the patrol leader. "Hey! Hey! I
gotta go wee!"
"Huh? Wha? Go back to sleep." The little scout crawls back
over everyone and
goes back to sleep for 5 seconds.
The little scout climbs over all the other sleeping scouts, who try to
remain
asleep, and shakes the patrol leader. "Hey! Hey! I gotta go
wee!"
"OK! OK!", says the patrol leader, "If you've gotta go,
then go."
The little scout stands up and waves his hands in the air: "Weee!!!!"
88. In the Furniture Store
You need a furniture store salesman and a customer who knows what is
happening. Before the salesman can sell anything, he needs
stock. Call for
volunteers from the audience: four to lie down to make the rug;
three to crouch as
the couch; one or two chairs; a lamp; and most important, one good
natured fellow
to get down on all fours as the coffee table. When all are ready,
a customer enters
and asks to see a couch. The salesman shows him the furniture,
extolling its high
quality and low price. He pays particular attention to the coffee
table: beautiful,
sturdy, mark and mar-proof, etc.
The customer shows some interest. The salesman pats and wiggles
the coffee
table to show how firm and steady it is, then picks up a cup (empty) and
says
something like, "See this cup of water? Pretend it's coffee.
When it sits on this table,
you know it will never spill!" He places the cup between the
shoulder blades of the
coffee table and jiggles it gently. "See!" The customer
says he'll think about it and
leaves. The dejected salesman dismisses all the furniture except
the coffee table
and leaves. The coffee table tries to figure out how he will get
up without spilling
what he thinks is a cup of water all over himself. Cheer him on!
89. The Land Shark
The scene is a living room with a radio playing. A Scout is
changing stations.
There is an announcement, read from off stage: "We interrupt
this station to bring
you an important news bulletin. A criminal known as the Land Shark
has been seen
on the streets of this town! He knocks on the doors of suspecting
people, disguises
his voice, and upon entrance, devours them leaving no traces. If
the Land Shark
shows up at your door, do not open it, and call the police
immediately. We now
return you to our regularly scheduled broadcast."
Scout, turning off radio: "I hope that Land Shark doesn't
show up here."
Three loud knocks are heard. "Who is it?"
Offstage: "Pizza delivery"
Scout: "Oh, great! Come on in!" He reaches offstage to
open the door. Hands
reach out and pull him off with a loud growl. Curtain closes.
Curtain opens on another Scout: "I've heard so many rumors
about that Land
Shark. I'm curious." (Three loud knocks.) "Who is
it?"
Offstage: "Luke Paterson from Metropolitan Life."
Scout: "What do you want?"
Offstage: "I need to review your policy. Your never
know when something might happen!"
Scout: "Come in." Opens door. Loud growl.
Grabbed and pulled offstage. Curtain closes.
Curtain opens on an older Scout. He hears three knocks.
"Who is it?"
Offstage: "Pharmacy delivery."
Scout: "I didn't order any medicine."
Offstage: "Candygram."
Scout: "From whom?"
Offstage: "Plumber."
Scout: "My pipes are fine! Say, I know who this is.
It's that nasty Land Shark!"
Offstage, in a small voice: "I'm only a guppy, sir."
Scout: "Oh, all right. Come in, then." Opens the
door and is pulled offstage. More
growls. Curtain closes.
Curtain opens on an old, sharp Scout. He hears three knocks.
"Who is it?"
Offstage: "Boy Scout Troop 144. Would you like to buy
some fertilizer, sir?"
Scout, looks at the audience and smiles knowingly: "Just a
minute." He gets a
large stick and prepares to hit the Shark. "Come in."
He swings the stick offstage. There is a loud thump. A very
young Scout in full
uniform stumbles onto the stage and dramatically falls, face first.
90. Let Me Have It!
This is an old, old vaudeville stunt. It depends on the
interaction between the
players and the crowd. Overacting and showing off should be
encouraged. The only
prop needed is a length of rubber tubing, such as a piece of old bicycle
inner tube.
The skit should be practiced, both for the greatest effect and for the
protection
of the Scout, who must know how to absorb the blow. The Scout
turns his back to
the Master of Ceremonies. He bends partly forward, and pulls the
tubing over his
shoulder. When the tubing is released, he falls forward and rolls
toward the opposite
shoulder. If he holds the tube properly, it will fly over his
shoulder with a 'Snap!' He
will not be hurt unless he takes the blow squarely. The Master of
Ceremonies should
know what is going to happen and how he should act, but he does not have
to know
when he will receive his long-distance phone call.
The Skit
The Master of Ceremonies is presiding over a Court of Honor or a
campfire. A
Scout runs onto the stage and interrupts him dramatically, " I have
a long distance
telephone call for you!"
The Scout has a length of rubber tubing. He hands one end to the
MC, explaining
that this is the phone line. "I'll get the line straightened
out and connect you. When
I say 'Ring-Ring', you hold it up to your ear and say 'Let me have it',
and you'll get your call."
The MC looks skeptical, looks at the Scout, then at the tube, then at
the Scout
again and finally agrees. The Scout stretches the line and says,
"Ring- Ring". The
MC looks at the audience, then at the Scout, and plays dumb.
"What was I supposed to say?"
The Scout walks back and repeats his instructions very patiently.
He rehearses
the MC, making him repeat the lines. They try again. The
Scout stretches the line
further than before. He says, "Ring-Ring". The MC
forgets again.
The Scout goes through it all again. This time he gets the
audience to help by
saying the key phrase, "Let me have it!" With a big grin
for the audience, he repeats
this several times.
This time he stretches the tube to its limits, turning his back to the
MC, bending
over, and holding the tube over his shoulder. He looks at the
audience. "Ready?"
"Ready!" "Ring-Ring."
The MC looks at the audience and grins. Now he understands.
"Wait. What am
I supposed to say?"
The Scout frowns at the audience, loses his temper, and calls out,
"Let Me Have
It!" The MC lets go.
91. Letters from Home
Props: Two sheets of paper.
Scott: (Enters) Gee, it's always nice to get a letter
from home when you're atcamp.
Robin: (Enters) Hey, look, I got a letter from my Mom.
Scott: Me too. Listen, my Mom says she's writing this letter
slowly, because she
knows I can't read fast.
Robin: Mine says I won't know the house when I come home..
They've moved !
Scott: Oh, my Dad has a new job with 500 men under him. He's
cutting the grass
at the cemetery.
Robin: Our neighbors started keeping pigs. Mom got wind of
it this morning.
Scott: Oh, my goodness. My little brother came home from
school crying because
all the other boys had new clothes and we can't afford any for
him. Mom says she
got him a new hat and lets him stand in the window.
Robin: There was a washing machine in the new house. But my
Mom put four
shirts in it, pulled the handle and they disappeared. Guess it
doesn't work right.
Scott: My Mom had her appendix out and a dishwasher put in.
And, oh, my sister
had a baby this morning. Mom doesn't know if I'm an Aunt or and
Uncle, because she
doesn't know yet if it's a boy or a girl.
Robin: Oh, dear, there's a P.S. It says, I was going to send
you $ 10.00, but I had
already sealed the envelope.
Scott: Well, it's nice to know things are normal at home.
Robin: Yep. (Both exit)
(With this skit it is possible to put each boy's script on a sheet of
paper, and they
can read it out, as though they were reading the letter. They
should rehearse, of
course, to make it sound natural.)
92. The Motorcycle Shop
The Motorcycle Dealer introduces himself and his shop. He stocks
many types
of motorcycles, and they are all in excellent condition. In fact,
he will demonstrate
how good they are by making a sale to the next customer who walks in the
door.
First, of course, he needs some volunteers from the audience.
Three are selected,
and each is briefed quickly as he comes to the front. (Choose
scapegoats who have
characteristics similar to the motorcycle they will represent.) The
first is to go
slowly when started. The second will go very fast, almost losing
its rider. The third
should not go anywhere. They are lined up on their hands and knees
facing the
crowd. "Now," says the Dealer, "You can see what
fine motorcycles I have."
A Scout walks in and asks if he has any motorcycles for sale. Of
course, the
Dealer is eager to show his stock.
This first one is a Smith (use the victim's name). It's only 200
cc's, but a nice
little machine. The Dealer makes his sales pitch and invites the
Buyer to go for a
ride. The Buyer straddles the Smith, raises himself up and mimics
using the kick
starter. The Buyer makes motorcycle noises, not very
energetically. He 'rides'
(actually straddles and walks) the Smith around in a slow circle,
returning to the
starting point. "That's too slow," says the Buyer,
"Do you have anything more powerful?"
The next motorcycle is a 1000 cc Yablonski. Again the Buyer climbs
aboard and
operates the kick starter. The Yablonski roars to life and races
around in a circle.
The Buyer can barely hold on. "That's too fast! I could kill
myself on that one!"
The Dealer says he thinks he has just the right one, a Jones that he
recently
received on trade-in. It's in good condition and has about the
right power. The Buyer
climbs on and tries to start. He makes sputtering noises.
After several trials, he
complains that something just isn't right because the Jones won't
start. He gets off
and stands looking at the motorcycle.
The Dealer yells angrily to Joe, who is offstage, "Joe! I
thought I told you to put
gas in the Jones!"
Joe replies, "Sorry Boss! I'll do it right now!" Joe enters
quickly with a bucket or
gas can and pours water onto the rear end of the Jones.
93. Musical Toilet Seat Salesman
A scout is a door to door salesman, selling Musical Toilet Seats:
If you have some
cardboard make props like toilet seats. Salesman approaches each
home knocks on
the door and sells the seat:
Salesman: "Good morning sir, I like to show you the newest
thing in electronic
technology. My company has developed the new musical toilet
seat. Would you be
interested in buying this modern day marvel?"(ham this up, plead
beg, etc. be a door
to door salesman) Customer 1: "Do you have one that
plays Dixie?" Customer 2
asked for "Eat the Rich" . Customer 3 asked for
"Star Spangled Banner" Salesman,
I sure do, Here it is, I hope you like it. I'll come back tomorrow
to make sure you are satisfied."
The next day the Salesman goes back and asked of each customer:
How did you
like the musical toilet seat.? Customer 1: "It was
great, it played Dixie and I sat
there with a bucket of fried chicken enjoying each note. Customer
2: "It was great.
I listened and read a copy of the Rolling Stone magazine."
Customer 3: "I hated it,
It just did not work out.
Salesman responds to Customer 3: "we have never had an
unsatisfied customer,
what went wrong? Customer 3: " It's that music.
"Every time I sit down on the
toilet, it starts playing the Star Spangled Banner and I have to stand
up again!"
94. The Outlaw
I was recently on staff at Camp Birch of the 95' staff, and this was the
most
popular of them all we did.
This is set in the western era in the 1800's. Characters:
An Out Law, Partner, swinging doors(that squeak when opened), One person
playing Wife of the Out Law, the Son of the Out Law, Camera person, Very
Outgoing
Director with German accent.
ANY MISSPELLINGS ARE INTENTIONAL, THIS IS HOW IT IS SUPPOSED TO BE
PRONOUNCED
Director: Pleses(Places), Pleses, evedybody. Now do we
haave thees down?(Be
creative)
(Every one nods)
Director: Aaalrright aand aaction.
Out Law: Say there pardner, got a match.
Pardner: Yep.
Out Law: Can I have it.
Pardner: Nope.
Out Law: I think I'm gonna take it, what are YOU gonna do about
it.
Pardner: I'ma gonna shootcha. (quickly pulls out gun and
fires)
Out Law: (Falls to ground)
Son: Daddy, daddy. (Huddling over Out Law)
Wife: OH! MY POOR HUSBAND!(Huddling over Out Law)
Director: (in a perterbed and angry voice) Cuuuuuuuuuuut! Thaat
was terrible,
were do we get these aactors. Let's do it again, do eet slowwwwer
/ faaster / like an
opra.(CHANGE WORDING AROUND EACH TIME, it will sound repetitive if you
don't)
(look of question in faces)
(repeat slower)
(repeat really fast)
(repeat like opra)
The End
This skit is hilarious, you can have fun doing it and adding your own
episodes onto it.
95. The King's Raisins
"I am the King. Bring me my raisins!"
First squire, "Here are raisins, sire, from the hills of
California!"
"Those raisins are not fit for peasants! Bring me my raisins!"
Second squire, "Here are raisins, sire, from the vineyards of
France!"
The King, "They are hardly worth sneezing at. Bring me my
raisins!"
Third squire ,"These raisins, sire, were hand-picked with
tweezers by Benedictine
Monks in Germany! "
The King, "These are the worst yet! Bring me my royal raisin
supplier!"
Two guys drag in the royal raisin supplier
The King, "Why have you not brought me my raisins?"
Royal raisin supplier, "My rabbit died!"
96. Tankety Tank
This skit requires little preparation and no props, and has only two
speaking parts.
It can use a cast of hundreds, and it is full of blood, gore, and dead
bodies. That
makes it perfect for Cub Scouts and campfires.
Preparation
The Wizard and the lone Scout need to rehearse their lines, and
everybody should
practice a few times. The practice is as much fun as the
skit. Encourage all
participants to ham it up. The Wizard should wear a long bathrobe.
The Skit
A lone Scout rushes onto the stage and screams that the enemy is
coming. He
has no weapons to fight with! What should he do? "I
know. I'll have to ask the
Wizard. It's my only chance to save humanity from the terrible
enemy."
The Wizard enters the stage, and the Scout rushes to him begging for
help. The
Wizard tells him not to panic, and hands him a secret invisible
sword. The Wizard
explains the sword, and tells him to say, "Stabety Stab!" when
he uses it. The Wizard
assures the Scout that this magic sword will protect him.
The Wizard retires to a quiet corner of the stage.
The Scout is delighted. He waves the sword around, and tells
everybody about
it. He boasts about what he will do with it. He moves to one
end of the stage.
Several enemy soldiers sneak onto the other side of the stage, saying,
"There he
is" and "Let's get him." The Scout panics as they
approach, worries aloud about what
to do, and finally remembers to use the magic sword. Yelling
"Stabety Stab!" over
and over, he kills all of the enemy in a mighty battle. He is very
proud of himself, and
boasts of his ability.
More enemy soldiers begin to enter. The Scout starts forward,
yelling "Stabety
Stab!" but the enemy keeps on coming. The Scout rushes
back to the Wizard for
more help. The Wizard gives him an invisible gun, telling him to
yell, "Bangety Bang!"
Again the Scout boasts about his weapon, goes into battle, and kills all
the
enemy. Again he boasts that he can defeat any enemy with the
Wizard's magic
weapons.
The situation is repeated, and the Scout tries "Bangety Bang!"
and "Stabety Stab!"
without success. This time the Wizard gives him a magic laser, for
which the Scout
yells, "Zapety Zap!" Again he kills all the enemy and
boasts. The Wizard quietly
disappears.
A single enemy soldier enters the stage. He is the biggest Scout
in camp. He
creeps slowly forward, as our Scout boasts about how easily he can
defeat the
enemy. The enemy soldier ignores the "Stabety Stab!",
"Bangety Bang!", and "Zapety
Zap!", as the Scout tries them several times. The Scout looks
desperately for the
Wizard.
The enemy moves faster across the stage. As he knocks the Scout
down and runs
over him, he yells, "Tankety Tank! Tankety Tank!"
97. The Thirsty Donkey
The man leads his donkey around the campfire. "Water!
Water!" cries the donkey with a raspy voice.
"Patience, jackass, patience" says the man.
The man leads his donkey around the campfire. "Water!
Water!" cries the donkey with a raspy voice.
"Patience, jackass, patience" says the man.
The man leads his donkey around the campfire. "Water!
Water!" cries the donkey with a raspy voice.
"Patience, jackass, patience" says the man.
The man leads his donkey around the campfire. "Water!
Water!" cries the donkey with a raspy voice.
"Patience, jackass, patience" says the man.
And they keep walking in circles around the campfire and repeating this
(about
5 times) until someone in the audience yells, "Hey, when are you
going to get to the
punch line???" (Set this person up ahead of time to yell
this)
The man yells back "Patience, jackass, patience!!"
98. The Weather Man
This is performed on a stage. Hang a large map, or a sheet with
some outlines
drawn on it, across the back of the stage. Since the skit involves
water, it is a good
idea to use a waterproof groundcloth to protect the stage.
Plan the skit, assemble the materials, and assign responsibilities ahead
of time.
Everybody except the Scapegoat knows what will happen. Let the
Scouts decide
what kind of weather to use, and what props are needed to represent it.
The Skit
The Weather Man stands in front of the map, and presents a parody of the
television evening news report. He reads from a script in his
hand. As he announces
each kind of weather, it appears, aimed straight at him from off-stage.
He announces that the South will have wind. The backdrop shakes
and a large fan
blows the papers in his hand.
The Weather Man reports that there will be snow in the North.
White confetti
drops from the sky, or over the map. He reports hail in the
Midwest, and small white
objects pelt him. (Plastic packing makes good hail.)
Each time the weather reacts to his report, the Weather Man acts more
scared.
Finally, he turns the page, stops, and protests that he can't do this
any more. He
needs a brave person to read the last forecast for him, and asks for a
volunteer from
the audience. With the help of the audience, the 'volunteer' is
selected and pushed forward.
The Scapegoat is handed the script, and reads, "And tomorrow this
area will have
heavy rains." Instantly, he is hit by a bucket of water from
offstage.
Variation
The Weather Man and the Scapegoat will clearly expect something.
In fact, the
Weather Man will usually have a hard time hiding his anticipation.
Without warning
him about the actual outcome, get him wet instead of the Scapegoat.
99. Who Sneezed?
One boy plays sergeant and the rest line up in a row facing the
audience. The
sergeant tells them to come to attention for inspection. The last
boy in line sneezes.
The sergeant asks who sneezed and doesn't get an answer. He asks
the man who
sneezed to step forward in a threatening and commanding tone. The
sergeant asks
the first boy if he sneezed and he denies it. The sergeant shoots
him. The next boy
in line is asked if he sneezed and he replies, "Not since I was 10
years old." The
sergeant shoots him. Each boy has a different answer as to why he
didn't sneeze and
the sergeant shoots each one until the last boy is reached. This
boy really worried
and shaking, admits that he sneezed but pleads to the sergeant not to
shoot him.
The sergeant says that he isn't going to shoot him but just wanted to
say
GESUNDHEIT !
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